Essential Emotional Intelligence Practices for New Managers in Tech

A management philosophy by Kim Scott that emphasizes caring personally while challenging directly. It provides a practical matrix for giving feedback that is both honest and compassionate, helping new managers avoid being 'ruinously empathetic' or 'obnoxiously aggressive' in tech settings.

A communication process developed by Marshall Rosenberg that focuses on expressing observations, feelings, needs, and requests without judgment. It is highly effective for tech managers navigating complex interpersonal conflicts or performance reviews with engineers.

Written by Camille Fournier, this book offers specific guidance for engineers moving into management roles. It covers everything from mentoring individual contributors to managing managers, with a strong emphasis on the emotional and cultural shifts required in technical leadership.

This resource explores how organizational structure impacts developer happiness and velocity. It introduces concepts like stream-aligned teams and platform teams, helping managers design structures that reduce cognitive load and improve collaboration through clear interaction models.

Based on Harvard Business Review research by Amy Edmondson, this concept focuses on creating an environment where team members feel safe to take risks and voice concerns. New managers use this to build trust within engineering squads, leading to higher innovation and error reporting.

A best-practice guide for conducting effective 1:1s that focus on employee well-being rather than just project status updates. It includes templates for agenda setting, active listening techniques, and follow-up actions to ensure consistent support and career development for direct reports.

A model by Blanchard that adapts leadership style based on the development level of the team member. It helps new tech managers determine when to direct, coach, support, or delegate tasks to software developers depending on their competence and commitment levels.

A comprehensive guide to conducting code reviews with emotional intelligence. It emphasizes constructive criticism, avoiding tone-deaf comments, and recognizing the human behind the code, which is crucial for maintaining morale during high-pressure development cycles.

A structured coaching framework (Goal, Reality, Options, Will) used by managers to guide employees toward solutions rather than providing immediate answers. It empowers senior engineers to solve problems independently while providing targeted support to junior developers.

A popular self-assessment tool and book by Travis Bradberry that breaks down EQ into four skills: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship management. It offers specific strategies to improve each skill area for better workplace interactions.

Modern approaches to feedback that reject the 'compliment-criticism-compliment' sandwich method. Instead, it promotes direct, behavior-focused feedback using models like STAR (Situation, Task, Action, Result) to ensure clarity and reduce defensive reactions in technical teams.

Transparent frameworks that define what success looks like at various levels of technical leadership. New managers use these to have equitable promotion conversations, ensuring that performance expectations are clear and emotionally fair for all team members.

Specific practices such as paraphrasing, validating feelings, and asking open-ended questions. These techniques help managers fully understand the constraints and frustrations engineers face, fostering deeper empathy and more effective problem-solving during brainstorming sessions.

A cultural practice in tech where incidents are analyzed to improve systems rather than assign fault. New managers must champion this approach to encourage transparency, learning, and psychological safety when things go wrong in production environments.

Guidance on how new managers should communicate needs, resources, and blockers to their own superiors. It focuses on building trust with upper leadership by presenting data-driven arguments and aligning team goals with broader organizational objectives.

Resources focused on recognizing and mitigating unconscious bias in hiring, promotion, and daily interactions. It provides actionable steps for managers to create diverse teams and ensure all voices are heard during technical design reviews and decision-making processes.

A guide to handling disagreements over technical architecture or design decisions without personal animosity. It emphasizes separating people from problems and focusing on shared goals, which is critical for maintaining team cohesion during high-stakes development phases.

Strategies for identifying signs of burnout in high-performing developers and implementing sustainable work practices. New managers learn to balance delivery pressure with team well-being, ensuring long-term productivity and retention in fast-paced tech environments.

Creative ideas for fostering connection and trust in distributed engineering teams. These activities go beyond casual chat, focusing on shared learning experiences and collaborative problem-solving to build strong interpersonal bonds among remote staff.

A practical book by Michael Bungay Stanier that introduces seven essential questions to make coaching conversations shorter, more focused, and easier to integrate into a busy managerial schedule. It helps managers become more effective coaches without spending hours on development.